Happiness & Music

Regardless of where you are in your life, there is much worse and much better but the struggle is where true happiness can be found.

In western society there seems to be a common theme when the subject of happiness comes up. It's money. Of course, we're hardwired as survivalists and in order to "survive" one must have food, shelter...all of the essentials to keep oneself from death but in those terms, money is more of a misery deterrent than a means of happiness.

This, of course, is 2021 and we are all far too enlightened these days to believe that money is the true key to happiness but what if "happiness" isn't even happiness?

A common question I've heard over the years goes a little something like "If you could have the exact life you wanted, what would it be?". Obviously, responses vary person to person but tend to stay within these few themes; money, marriage, house, kids, career, and health. It all sounds great but if you could snap your fingers and have it all, would you be happy? Probably not for long. So, what does it even mean to be happy?

If you were to take a look at the bullet points of my music career, you may deduce that it's been a huge failure. I struggled harder than most thought I should, I was terrible at business (still am), and when the major labels came knocking, I got so sick that I had to walk away from music entirely. That seems like complete failure, often even to me! But even so, every time I hear that final mix of a new track play, or see the look in a kid's eyes when one of my songs hits them a certain way, that to me is pure success. Of course these are just moments that only happen after a year or two of work and struggle, so perhaps that doesn't seem worth it to some.

Dr. Jordan Peterson (a clinical psychologist) once said "Happiness should not be sought, it is a byproduct of the search for meaning and the pursuit of character." I agree with him but to take the idea a step further, I believe there is no meaning to be found that isn't some form of service to your fellow man. That doesn't mean you can't make lots of money or strive for your own personal goals in life. But to use your chosen path as benefit to your family, your friends and your community should be the end goal.

Assuming this theory is correct, how does one create meaning in their life, especially if you're starting from misery and meaninglessness? Well, I'm currently seeking that answer myself and I'm much further along than I thought I'd be. I'm sure I have a long way to go but here's what has worked for me so far...

First, I narrowed my field of vision. Life is impossible when staring at it in it's entirety. I decided what was most important to me, focused on the tiniest first step in achieving that, and focused my energy on that until it became second nature. Then and only then was I able to take on something else along with it. If I failed, I shrunk my perspective further until it was achievable.

Secondly, I took responsibility. Responsibility isn't looked at as a good thing but it should be. Taking responsibility means not allowing yourself to believe in the lie that anyone else but you is in control of your fate. Once you remove those obstacles in your mind, you will be shocked how much easier it is to face the real ones in your life. Of course, taking responsibility also means owning your mistakes but having narrowed your field of vision means there is less damage that can be done by those mistakes, and even if you do damage in your life, you're going to take responsibility for it and fix it to the best of your ability.

And thirdly, I took time to stop and appreciate even the smallest of accomplishments. And I literally mean "stop". I took time as often as possible to sit in silence and reflect on my victories. Not from a place of pride but humility and thankfulness. Regardless of where you are in your life, there is much worse and much better but the struggle is where true happiness can be found.

Every moment of your life is a song waiting to be written. It could be beautiful, it could be tragic, it could be any number of things but real meaning is found in sharing your life's songs with others so they can relate and find comfort in the truth of human connectivity. Regardless of your lot in life, you can use your experience in the service of others. That is where meaning can be found.

Let's complete this cryptic night

With a tragic ending taking flight

And crashing down again in fires glowing light

And I will never be the same

Because we were beautiful in flames

Windows and Shadows by Complete 2004